The Last March of Westoby

The groom wears the One Ring token all weekend. Caught without it: immediate penalty decided by the nearest witness.

Lowest score in any challenge gets the Gollum title for one hour and must refer to any burger as 'my precious'.

Each lad delivers a one-sentence quest memory with Olly. Best line wins glory; dead line means a forfeit.

Teams predict the next chaos event (late arrival, wrong turn, burger demand, etc.). Closest prophecy earns immunity.

Any time Olly uses his vertical advantage for tactical gain, he must issue a dramatic speech in full ranger mode.

Cai may invoke the Gimli Clause once per night: one dramatic challenge reroll with dwarven confidence.

If Olly fails any trivial climb, step, or obstacle, he must accept the title 'Lord of the Ground Floor' for the next chapter.

At Big Depot, each team picks one climber to attempt a route in under the agreed timer. Fastest clean finish takes glory; slowest team leads the next chant for thirty seconds.

Any climber who says 'this one looks easy' and then slips must complete the next route while delivering a dramatic Fellowship speech between moves.

At karting, best lap wins the title Rider of Rohan. Anyone who finishes last must announce every overtake attempt in race-commander voice for the rest of the stop.

Before the race starts, each team predicts podium order. Exact prediction earns immunity from one forfeit; worst prediction carries helmets and kit like loyal squires.

At shooting, each lad calls their confidence level before first shots (low, medium, high). If performance misses their call by miles, they must accept a temporary title chosen by the group.

If anyone forgets a range safety instruction, the group triggers an instant tribunal: one dramatic accusation, one defence, one absurd sentence.

Whenever burger cravings trigger a route debate, the convoy votes by raised hand. Minority side owes next round of snacks.

Anyone who says 'I’m full' before the room agrees they are full must give a toast to the groom and explain which LOTR character they’re most like and why.

At NQ64, teams choose three arcade games and post a combined score. Lowest total team performs a synchronized victory dance for the winning team.

At Speak in Code, each lad gets a secret word. If caught saying it naturally in conversation, they gain a point; forced usage loses a point and invites immediate mockery.

Rapid-fire quiz across LOTR lore, Olly/Ffion history, and fellowship nonsense. Losing team takes a creative forfeit.

Saturday morning, teams draft the perfect recovery breakfast from available options. Worst pitch by public vote must do clean-up duty at the flat before departure.

Complete a scavenger list: dramatic skyline, cursed expression, improbable pose, and one accidental masterpiece.

If suspicious atmospheric activity is detected around Olly, nearest witness records an Omen Point. Most Omen Points by Sunday earns the title 'Windlord'.

No tabs, no freeloading, no vanishing wallets. Anyone who falls behind on fairness owes a public apology in medieval style.